〖爱词霸奥运英语版“戴尔杯”翻译大赛第三期点评〗NO25~NO32号作品
注：红色部分为点评部分，获奖结果在主贴上公布！
【公告】爱词霸奥运英语版“戴尔杯”翻译大赛第三期点评〖主贴〗 
二十五号作品---danielle147
The Olympic flame in ancient Greece was stand for Peace(到底是被动还是主动语态): Where the flame came(arrived), where the war stopped to join the sports competition sincerely. But since Coubertin updated(复兴而非更新) the modernistic Olympic in 1896, new problems such as resources, ethnicity, belief, rapacity or something else to obstruct so that wars could never be ceased. As the human could not deal with these problems, they could just forlorn and endured the reality.
Dove flies, flame shines, all the world is covered with the saintly, peacefully and friendly light. Now the 29th Olympic Games will be held in Beijing! This time, the venerable Olympic and the venerable Chinese culture will be connected together. Beijing, China, All the people of China are using all their passion to welcome the Olympic. We collected the venerable flame and spreading it, feeling it, keeping it(请保持语态时态一直). We love peace, all of us love peace. We Chinese will keep the Olympic vitality along and along.(简化的也太多,,原文意思都未能表达)
One world, one dream. With the same sky, we live. We all know that there isn't love, there isn’t anything! (此句没能明确的表达出文章的主体，有点含糊其词)
点评：总体还不错，但是全文给人感觉太过疆硬，读着很吃力的感觉，对原文把握还不够。
评分：75分
点评:注意时态语态,对原文把握差.
评分:72
最后由 leo520 于 2008-09-22 09:27:18编辑
